meditation 060624
The overwhelming feeling of talking to somebody fiercely independent makes me feel there’s another world out there I’ve been missing. The independent world. The world of living by yourself, being ‘out there’, taking care of yourself, and being accountable for your actions. Let me regroup my thoughts.
I’m less than four years away from 30. I don’t feel old. I feel like a highschooler the way I still travel about backpacking here and there. So I feel like her. She is not able to articulate all her thoughts but she is thinking and it makes me think if when I was 18 I had the capacity to think the way she thinks now, even though her thoughts and utterances are not complete, that I might be able to make the right choices sooner. There is something about her, something of an immense energy that comes from being ‘out there’, an out-of-this-world kind of worldliness. “There’s a lot I want to do,” she says. “Of all those things, is there one thing that you feel a particular passion for?” I asked. She thinks about it. She looks up in the sky and around and the whole entire world is here for her as she stands between the end of highschool and the start of university about to devour every ounce of meaning in her surroundings. There is immense energy in that.
I look at myself and I say yes, I’m well on this path extracting meaning out of everything I see and hear. I try to say how I feel and I try to say how I feel and I try. Then I come home and write down how I try. Then I go out and try some more. And I learn about people and myself.
I’m less than four years away from 30. I don’t feel old. I feel like a highschooler the way I still travel about backpacking here and there. So I feel like her. She is not able to articulate all her thoughts but she is thinking and it makes me think if when I was 18 I had the capacity to think the way she thinks now, even though her thoughts and utterances are not complete, that I might be able to make the right choices sooner. There is something about her, something of an immense energy that comes from being ‘out there’, an out-of-this-world kind of worldliness. “There’s a lot I want to do,” she says. “Of all those things, is there one thing that you feel a particular passion for?” I asked. She thinks about it. She looks up in the sky and around and the whole entire world is here for her as she stands between the end of highschool and the start of university about to devour every ounce of meaning in her surroundings. There is immense energy in that.
I look at myself and I say yes, I’m well on this path extracting meaning out of everything I see and hear. I try to say how I feel and I try to say how I feel and I try. Then I come home and write down how I try. Then I go out and try some more. And I learn about people and myself.
posted by Adam C at
11:06 AM
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